Mens Rules

Discussion in 'LOL's' started by supermoto, 22/1/20.

  1. supermoto

    Not Rated Member

    0/5,

    supermoto ex vaper

    Threads:
    8
    Posts:
    156
    Country:
    South Africa
    Joined:
    2/1/17
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Center of the universe. Eastern Cape
    Ratings:
    +810
    MEN RULES

    WE ALWAYS HEAR 'THE RULES' FROM THE FEMALE SIDE
    NOW HERE ARE THE RULES FROM THE MALE SIDE

    THESE ARE OUR RULES!

    PLEASE NOTE. THESE ARE ALL NUMBERED #1 ON PURPOSE!

    1. MEN ARE NOT MIND READERS.

    1. LEARN TO WORK THE TOILET SEAT. YOU'RE A BIG GIRL. IF IT'S UP, PUT IT DOWN. WE NEED IT UP, YOU NEED IT DOWN. YOU DON'T HEAR US COMPLAINING ABOUT YOU LEAVING IT DOWN.

    1. CRYING IS BLACKMAIL.

    1. ASK FOR WHAT YOU WANT. LET US BE CLEAR ON THIS ONE:

    SUBTLE HINTS DO NOT WORK!
    STRONG HINTS DO NOT WORK!
    OBVIOUS HINTS DO NOT WORK!
    JUST SAY IT!

    1. YES AND NO ARE PERFECTLY ACCEPTABLE ANSWERS TO ALMOST EVERY QUESTION.

    1. COME TO US WITH A PROBLEM ONLY IF YOU WANT HELP SOLVING IT. THAT'S WHAT WE DO. SYMPATHY IS WHAT YOUR GIRLFRIENDS ARE FOR.

    1. ANYTHING WE SAID 6 MONTHS AGO IS INADMISSIBLE IN AN ARGUMENT. IN FACT, ALL COMMENTS BECOME NULL AND VOID AFTER 7 DAYS.

    1. IF YOU THINK YOU'RE FAT, YOU PROBABLY ARE. DON'T ASK US.

    1. IF SOMETHING WE SAID CAN BE INTERPRETED TWO WAYS AND ONE OF THE WAYS MAKES YOU SAD OR ANGRY, WE MEANT THE OTHER ONE.

    1. YOU CAN EITHER ASK US TO DO SOMETHING OR TELL US HOW YOU WANT IT DONE. NOT BOTH.
    IF YOU ALREADY KNOW BEST HOW TO DO IT, JUST DO IT YOURSELF.

    1. WHENEVER POSSIBLE, PLEASE SAY WHATEVER YOU HAVE TO SAY DURING COMMERCIALS.

    1. CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS DID NOT NEED DIRECTIONS AND NEITHER DO WE...

    1. ALL MEN SEE IN ONLY 16 COLORS, LIKE WINDOWS DEFAULT SETTINGS..
    PEACH, FOR EXAMPLE, IS A FRUIT, NOT A COLOR. PUMPKIN IS ALSO A FRUIT. WE HAVE NO IDEA WHAT MAUVE IS.

    1. IF WE ASK WHAT IS WRONG AND YOU SAY 'NOTHING,' WE WILL ACT LIKE NOTHING'S WRONG. WE KNOW YOU ARE LYING, BUT IT IS JUST NOT WORTH THE HASSLE.

    1. IF YOU ASK A QUESTION YOU DON'T WANT AN ANSWER TO, EXPECT AN ANSWER YOU DON'T WANT TO HEAR..

    1. WHEN WE HAVE TO GO SOMEWHERE, ABSOLUTELY ANYTHING YOU WEAR IS FINE...REALLY.

    1. DON'T ASK US WHAT WE'RE THINKING ABOUT UNLESS YOU ARE PREPARED TO DISCUSS SUCH TOPICS AS BEER, BABES OR BIKES.

    1. YOU HAVE ENOUGH CLOTHES.

    1 . YOU HAVE TOO MANY SHOES.

    1. I AM IN SHAPE. ROUND IS A SHAPE!

    1. THANK YOU FOR READING THIS. YES, I KNOW, I HAVE TO SLEEP ON THE COUCH TONIGHT.. BUT DID YOU KNOW MEN REALLY DON'T MIND THAT? IT'S LIKE CAMPING...
     
    • Funny Funny x 7
    • Winner Winner x 6
    • Like Like x 2
    • List
  2. Hooked

    Excellent Member

    4.66667/5, 15 votes

    Hooked Got a lot to learn... ECIGSSA Donor

    Threads:
    810
    Posts:
    14,639
    Country:
    South Africa
    Joined:
    10/9/17
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Yzerfontein
    Ratings:
    +43,858
    supermoto Although I'm a woman I must say I agree with everything you've said, especially about colours. I have yet to meet a man who can name colours, unless he's an interior decorator!
     
    • Agree Agree x 2
    • Funny Funny x 1
    • List
  3. Humbolt

    Not Rated Member

    0/5,

    Humbolt Elite Vaper

    Threads:
    22
    Posts:
    1,021
    Country:
    South Africa
    Joined:
    15/8/14
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Cape Town
    Ratings:
    +2,061
    Copy, paste, send to wife.

    Wish me luck!
     
    • Optimistic Optimistic x 3
    • Funny Funny x 2
    • Like Like x 1
    • List
  4. supermoto

    Not Rated Member

    0/5,

    supermoto ex vaper

    Threads:
    8
    Posts:
    156
    Country:
    South Africa
    Joined:
    2/1/17
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Center of the universe. Eastern Cape
    Ratings:
    +810
    I showed my wife.. At first she laughed with me.. Will wait for later to see if I'm sleeping in the dog kennel
     
    • Funny Funny x 5
    • Like Like x 1
    • List
  5. Room Fogger

    Excellent Member

    5/5, 20 votes

    Room Fogger Reviewer, Reonaut and Vaping Addict ECIGSSA Donor

    Threads:
    33
    Posts:
    4,970
    Country:
    South Africa
    Joined:
    21/10/17
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Krugersdorp, West Rand
    Ratings:
    +26,150
    You don’t need luck Boet, more like a staaldak and a bulletproof vest!:cool:
     
  6. zadiac

    Excellent Member

    5/5, 5 votes

    zadiac Sub Ohm & Flavor Junkie Staff Member Moderator VIP

    Threads:
    156
    Posts:
    6,210
    Country:
    South Africa
    Joined:
    24/3/14
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Deneysville
    Ratings:
    +13,219
    Was nice knowing you...
     
    • Funny Funny x 3
    • Agree Agree x 1
    • List
  7. Humbolt

    Not Rated Member

    0/5,

    Humbolt Elite Vaper

    Threads:
    22
    Posts:
    1,021
    Country:
    South Africa
    Joined:
    15/8/14
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Cape Town
    Ratings:
    +2,061
    Just checking in to say I am still alive....barely...
     
    • Like Like x 3
    • Funny Funny x 2
    • Winner Winner x 1
    • List
  8. Christos

    Excellent Member

    5/5, 10 votes

    Christos Reonaut Staff Member Administrator VIP

    Threads:
    89
    Posts:
    7,819
    Country:
    South Africa
    Joined:
    3/8/15
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Johannesburg
    Ratings:
    +22,718
    What a poor reflection on men.
    I suspect this was written by a woman because all the points are 1. :D
     
    • Funny Funny x 3
    • Like Like x 1
    • List